San Jose Earthquakes v Colorado Rapids

ProSoccerTalk’s weekly MLS rankings (in two parts)

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Portland has a little opening this week in its quest to get off rock bottom, a home date against Chivas USA. But for this week … still on the bottom. Here are Nos. 11-19 in  ProSoccerTalk’s weekly rankings countdown.

(Nos. 1-10 are on deck …so check back)

19. Portland Timbers – About the big managerial change: this thing is not working out very well. You really have to wonder where this team’s mind is? Interim manager Gavin Wilkinson called that weekend collapse down in Dallas (a 5-0 loss) “humiliating.”

18. Colorado Rapids – Goalkeeper Matt Pickens (pictured) just re-upped his deal at DSG Park. Otherwise, not much good to say about a team that has lost five in a row. That’s getting to be pretty disturbing total in a league of abundant parity; Losing streaks that go any further usually mean significant player or coaching upheaval.

17. FC Dallas – Is Lady Luck finally starting to look Dallas’ way? The Texans took advantage of Portland’s malaise, taking the Timbers behind the woodshed in that 5-0 beat-down referenced above. Now comes a home date vs. Los Angeles, which is without its top two players, David Beckham and Landon Donovan – quite convenient for Dallas.

16. Montréal Impact – The Impact’s home record doesn’t look much like something an expansion team could cook up, 6-3-2 after last week’s win over Montreal at Stade Saputo. So cheers to you guys for that. But 1-10-1 road mark: blek! New York comes to visit this week, and it looks like a fun one. Can we get that with a side of Alessandro Nesta, please?

15. Toronto FC – Does wily old MLS hand Paul Mariner know how to work a deal in this league, or what? He swiped Eric Hassli from Vancouver for a Canadian song, and now Danny Koevermans injury (unfortunate as it is) doesn’t look quite so devastating.

14. Chivas USA – Losing to L.A. last week had an extra sting; the Galaxy is ahead of Chivas for the fifth and final Western Conference playoff spot. Robin Fraser’s team is still hanging around, but at this point they probably have a better chance of reeling in Seattle than Los Angeles, where the DPs have all found their groove.

13. Philadelphia Union – The club has won three of its last five, but the latest test was a forgettable loss to the Red Bulls. Now that the All-Star game has come and gone at PPL Park, we can all go back to wondering about Freddy Adu and what his absence last week was all about.

12. New England Revolution – Saer Sene’s goal-scoring has fallen right into Boston’s Back Bay, and who knows if the divers can recover it? The Revs are winless in three matches, and this week’s trip into PPL Park, home to the much improved Union, doesn’t look like the best spot to upend a spiral.

11. Columbus Crew – Following two consecutive losses, the men in yellow surely needed last week’s three points against D.C. United. Dilly Duka was a first-half beast; his ability to stay healthy and remain in the lineup could be the difference in reaching the playoffs or watching the playoffs.

VIDEO: T&T women’s team gives away one of the most bizarre PKs

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Play until you hear the referee’s whistle. In theory, so simple. In practice, it only takes a single second of concentration lapse to become an internet sensation for all the wrong reasons.

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Such is life for Karyn Forbes, member of the Trinidad and Tobago women’s national soccer team. In the above video, you’ll observe Forbes, a 24-year-old midfielder, giving away perhaps the most bizarre penalty kick you’ll ever see. You’ll have to watch for yourself to believe it.

[ MORE: USWNT opens Olympic qualifying with 5-0 victory ]

Unfortunately for Forbes, though the whole of the ball might have crossed the whole of the end line, the referee did not blow her whistle… not until Forbes picked the ball up with her hands and carried it to her goalkeeper.

Bundesliga to go ahead with video replay tests over two years

FILE - In this Saturday, Dec. 8, 2012, file photo, a Hawk-Eye camera is set up at Toyota stadium in Toyota. For the first time at a World Cup, technology will be used to determine whether a ball crosses the goal line during matches at the upcoming tournament in Brazil. With vanishing spray also being used to prevent encroachment by defenders making up a wall during free kicks, officials at the highest level of the world’s most popular sport are finally getting some assistance. (AP Photo/Shuji Kajiyama)
AP Photo/Shuji Kajiyama
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BERLIN (AP) The German Football League (DFL) has given the go-ahead for the possible testing of video replays in the Bundesliga over a two-year pilot phase.

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The DFL says it will be lodging an application with FIFA to take part if the pilot phase is approved by the International Football Association Board at its next annual general meeting on March 5.

The DFL says video replays could be used by a “team of impartial match officials for the purpose of avoiding any evidently incorrect decisions” and that the pilot phase would be preceded by “intensive preparations.”

[ MORE: 17-year-old American MF Pulisic gets Bundesliga debut for Dortmund ]

These would include the settlement of costs among FIFA, the IFAB, the DFL and German football federation, as well as training for the candidates.

West Ham extend Payet’s contract in “enormous show of faith”

West Ham’s Dimitri Payet celebrates after scoring while soap bubbles are blown during the English Premier League soccer match between West Ham and Newcastle at Boleyn Ground in London, Monday, Sept. 14, 2015.(AP Photo/Frank Augstein)
AP Photo/Frank Augstein
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West Ham United hope Dimitri Payet is going absolutely nowhere after the club announced on Thursday the 28-year-old Frenchman has signed a contract extension through the summer of 2021.

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Payet’s current contract was scheduled to keep him at the Premier League club through the summer of 2020, but a series of standout performances (6 goals, 4 assists so far this season, mostly during the season’s opening three months) and rumors of interest from “bigger” clubs meant tacking on another year — and plenty more cash — was the best way to keep Payet in east London for the foreseeable future. The club confirmed earlier this week that negotiations over an extension were underway.

“He’s the best player I’ve signed in 25 years,” said West Ham co-owner David Sullivan. “He’s a [$43 million] player. He’s a supreme footballer. He makes every player in our side play better. On his day, he’s world class, he’s unstoppable.”

Payet, who’s been at West Ham just eight months after signing last summer, could still depart in the summer should he finish the current season strong and/or show up and show out at the European Championship, which kicks off in June. In that event, West Ham would now bag a much heftier transfer fee than they would have done prior to the extension.

VIDEO: Dele Alli’s magnificent juggling goal recreated in hand-drawn crayon

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Remember that Dele Alli goal? No, not that one… that one. Of course you remember it. How could you not?

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How often does a player receive the ball out of the air, flick it over his head, spin 180 degrees and hit an inch-perfect volley from 20 yards out to secure all three points for his team? The answer is, of course, not very often.

[ MORE: Top 5 Premier League storylines — Sunday’s top-four battle royal

Thus, a goal such as Alli’s stunning winner against Crystal Palace last month has been, and will continue to be, immortalized through numerous recreations in this Digital Age. Above is Alli’s goal recreated in hand-drawn crayon.