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Holy self-destruction! Red Bulls fall apart against San Jose

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If anyone remembers how the New York Red Bulls lost a lead last week against Portland, walking back a potential win into a draw, well, know this:

That was nothing!

The Red Bulls had a late lead Sunday night, about to make their way back east with four points (of a possible six) from two matches away from home to open 2013, darn good work by almost any measure. (Especially considering the matches meant two cross-country road trips.)

But things unraveled spectacularly for Mike Petke’s team over the last 10 minutes Sunday; San Jose scored in the 83rd minute and again in stoppage time for a 2-1 win at Buck Shaw Stadium.

Red Bulls star Thierry Henry, remember, had some less than flattering things to say about his teammates after last week’s second-half clunker, about the club’s need for more high-level know-how.  So what in the world will the famous Frenchman think now? (And more to the point, will he keep it to himself?)

Credit the San Jose Earthquakes, who finally found a little of that missing 2012 magic, concocting a big rally that looked so familiar from last year’s sensational Supporters Shield run.

It seemed quite unlikely, too. Still missing from San Jose’s selections are bothersome strikers Alan Gordon and Steven Lenhart, speedy Marvin Chavez and skillful Simon Dawkins in the midfield and Steven Beitashour coming forward from his right back position. (All are injured except for Dawkins, who is back in England, now with Aston Villa.)

(MORE: We’ll soon learn more about rookie Red Bulls coach Mike Petke)

But second half sub Adam Jahn got the Earthquakes first goal of the season 83 minutes into Sunday evening when left unmarked at the far post.

Then, it was Jahn once again making something happen in stoppage time. Red Bulls left back Roy Miller was waving and arm where arms don’t need to be, preventing Jahn’s header off a corner kick from going goal-ward.

Goalkeeper Luis Robles, who had his share of shaky moments Sunday, came up with a huge stop. But Miller … well, what got into the man?

He was responsible for two late fouls that gave San Jose dangerous free kicks. Then his hand ball gifted San Jose with the penalty kick. And to put the cherry on this parfait of awful, Miller stepped into the penalty area so early prior to Wondolowski’s spot kick, referee Ricardo Salazar had little choice but to call for the re-kick.

Red Bulls players protested, but Miller was in so ridiculously early, Salazar made the correct call.

The 10-minute spell was an absolute fiasco.

Full highlights are here:

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Mourinho’s agent: Coach paid $27 million in taxes in Spain

LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND - DECEMBER 04:  Jose Mourinho manager of Manchester United stands alongside his substitute Marouane Fellaini of Manchester United during the Premier League match between Everton and Manchester United at Goodison Park on December 4, 2016 in Liverpool, England.  (Photo by Clive Brunskill/Getty Images)
Photo by Clive Brunskill/Getty Images
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MADRID (AP) Jose Mourinho’s agent says the Manchester United manager paid more than 26 million euros ($27 million) in taxes when he lived in Spain from 2010-13.

The information was made public on Tuesday by Gestifute, a company run by Mourinho’s agent, Jorge Mendes.

[ MORE: Pulisic wanted by Arsenal, Spurs ]

The Portuguese company has been releasing details about its clients’ tax declarations after European media outlets published what they claimed were details of apparent tax arrangements made by top soccer players and coaches, including Mourinho, Cristiano Ronaldo and Mesut Ozil.

Gestifute, which also has Ronaldo as a client, has already published documents allegedly showing that Spanish fiscal authorities have certified that Mourinho and Real Madrid star Ronaldo are “up to date on … obligations.”

Mourinho coached Real Madrid from 2010-13 and took charge of United this season.

Staying in Dallas: New contract for MLS Defender of the Year Hedges

HOUSTON, TX - MARCH 12:  Giles Barnes #10 of the Houston Dynamo battles for the ball with Matt Hedges #24 of FC Dallas during their game at BBVA Compass Stadium on March 12, 2016 in Houston, Texas.  (Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images)
Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images
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This is going to turn out to be one of the most exciting years of Matt Hedges’ life.

The FC Dallas man lead one of the best back lines in Major League Soccer to the Lamar Hunt U.S. Open Cup and the Supporters’ Shield.

[ MORE: PST talks with Hedges, Zimmerman ]

He’s also likely set for a chance to return to the USMNT fold under new coach Bruce Arena, as Hedges is one of the best players to be largely ignored by Jurgen Klinsmann.

Hedges, 26, was named the MLS Defender of the Year and made the Best XI, and now he’s inked a new long-term deal with FC Dallas.

The four-year deal will keep Hedges in Dallas through his 30th birthday. Capped once, Hedges has 159 appearances with 11 goals for FCD.

Follow @NicholasMendola

Two more Pulisic suitors in North London? USMNT teen in demand

Dortmund's Emre Mor, left, celebrates with Dortmund's Felix Passlack and Dortmund's Christian Pulisic, right, after scoring during the German Bundesliga soccer match between Borussia Dortmund and SV Darmstadt in Dortmund, Germany, Saturday, Sept. 17, 2016. Dortmund defeated Darmstadt with 6-0. (AP Photo/Martin Meissner)
AP Photo/Martin Meissner
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Christian Pulisic is one of the most exciting young prospects in the world.

It’s a statement that isn’t often said without hyperbole when it comes to American standouts, but the 18-year-old Borussia Dortmund man has seen his names in the gossip pages a few times this year.

While Liverpool has often been the destination, Italian site Calcio Mercato says Premier League interest is wider than Merseyside. The clubs? Arsenal and Tottenham Hotspur.

[ VOTE: Who should win USMNT player of year? ]

Dortmund doesn’t want to sell the youngster, who is locked up through 2019. The whispered price has been $31 million at a minimum, but perhaps BVB would be tempted given their wealth of young attacking options.

Pulisic has made 27 appearances for Borussia Dortmund, nabbing four goals and six assists. He has 11 caps and three goals for the USMNT as well.

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Real Madrid asks for “utmost respect” to Ronaldo following tax drama

BARCELONA, SPAIN - DECEMBER 03:  Cristiano Ronaldo of Real Madrid reacts after missing a chance during the La Liga  match between FC Barcelona and Real Madrid CF at Camp Nou on December 3, 2016 in Barcelona, Spain.  (Photo by David Ramos/Getty Images)
Photo by David Ramos/Getty Images
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Cristiano Ronaldo had been linked with massive tax evasion, but Real Madrid would ask you to kindly go back to treating him like a king now that he’s proven his innocence.

In a move usually reserved for politicians aiming for high office, Ronaldo’s agent released some of his tax documents to prove everything’s above board.

It all looks good, unlike what befell Neymar and Lionel Messi, so back off, huh?

[ MORE: Wednesday’s Champions League preview ]

From Real Madrid:

In view of the stories published over recent days and in consideration of the certificate issued by the Spanish Tax Agency which confirms that our player Cristiano Ronaldo is up to date with all of his tax obligations, Real Madrid C. F. call for the utmost respect to be shown towards Cristiano Ronaldo, whose conduct has been absolutely exemplary throughout all of his time at our club.

Only the utmost for CR7.

Real Madrid hosts Borussia Dortmund on Wednesday in a match which will decide Group F of the UEFA Champions League.

Follow @NicholasMendola