San Jose Earthquakes v Portland Timbers

MLS Preview: San Jose Earthquakes at D.C. United

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  • D.C. United is winless in 13 consecutive matches, an all-time club low
  • San Jose’s Chris Wondolowski has five goals halfway through the season after hitting 27 last year
  • The Earthquakes are being directed by interim manager Mark Watson

These teams are connected in a strange and fairly unfortunate way.

They are mirror imaged as underachievers of their respective conferences, much closer to the bottom of their groups than almost anyone imagined.  And the coaching situations at both addresses are marked by high instability, one having already claimed a prominent victim and another sure to happen unless things improve.

When San Jose kicks off at RFK Stadium (7 p.m. ET Saturday; official league preview is here), Earthquakes interim manager Mark Watson will oversee his second match since taking over for the suddenly deposed Frank Yallop. Presumably, things won’t be quite as eventful along the touchlines as they were in Watson’s interim debut, a surprisingly combustible meeting with Colorado.

Two members of the Rapids organization were dinged with one-game suspensions while San Jose escaped unhurt from league sanction. The Earthquakes will, however, miss 2012 league MVP and leading scorer Chris Wondolowski due to a right foot contusion, according to the club.

Not that his loss  is a crusher this year, as “Wondo” and his relative struggles are among the reasons San Jose is ahead of only lowly Chivas USA in the West. Five goals in 16 matches isn’t exactly awful, but considering Wondolowski (pictured above) had 27 last year in twice the number of matches … well, yeah.

Speaking of struggling:

D.C. United is awful. Shockingly awful, dead last in the East and, with just seven goals in 15 matches, on pace to be the worst offense in 19 MLS seasons. The 13-game winless streak is a club record and No. 13 in the spiral of woe was particularly galling to fans of the Black and Red.

(Again, no offense to you fans of the Reds … ) Last week’s 2-1 loss to similarly bedraggled Toronto came with this extra kick in the teeth: United actually had a lead. At home! And yet … 2-1 happened, a story told well in this humorous Washington Post bit. Truly, the season has gone so far sideways around D.C. United – we should all have our paychecks docked for picking this group to be a Western conference favorite – that humor is all that’s left.

So if both teams are awful, why is this match even worthy of “Preview” status? United’s only chance of salvaging the season was a stretch of three straight home matches in June. Ben Olen’s team has already blown one, now a ridiculous 1-6-1 at home.

Dwayne De Rosario and Nick DeLeon (bookends on the age scale) were OK in last week’s loss. Otherwise, pretty much everyone stunk.

San Jose has a little momentum going after last week’s win in Colorado.

ADDITIONAL NOTES – Earthquakes notorious rabble-rouser Steven Lenhart will be suspended for a match if he picks up a yellow card Saturday. Anyone want some of that action? … Same for San Jose tough guy defender Victor Bernardez, who is making a habit of suspensions lately, in league play and internationally. …Center back Brandon McDonald was back in United’s starting lineup, although the results were hardly encouraging. Hard to say who’s up next in there. … This will be the second match of San Jose 2.0 without Frank Yallop in charge; before last week, he had been the team’s only head coach since the club was re-born in 2008.

Beckham group abandons latest plans for Miami MLS stadium

David Beckham
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All signs seemed to point toward an all-too-familiar outcome for the David Beckham-led investment group hoping to bring a Major League Soccer franchise to the city of Miami: another failed plan in their bid to build a brand new stadium.

[ FOLLOW: All of PST’s MLS coverage ]

Earlier this month, newly-joined all-world sports executive Tim Leiweke warned that groups or individuals currently owning the various parcels of land surrounding the Miami Marlins’ baseball stadium, the latest site Miami Beckham United (MBU) had chosen, were making “unrealistic” demands and threatened to derail the project at that location.

Today, it’s been reported across South Florida that the group has altogether abandoned plans to build their stadium at that particular site. Miami city commissioner Francis Suarez confirmed that MBU were “moving in a different direction” — quotes from Local 10 News:

“It’s going to be withdrawn from the next agenda because the Beckham group has not acquired the private properties that are needed to construct the stadium on that site.”

“The residents expect us to hold these teams to the fire,” Suarez said. “A lot of times they’re financed by wealthy people and they want some sort of a public subsidy, which is very controversial as well, which is why we were going to take it to referendum.”

[ MORE: Timbers reach first MLS Cup | Crew SC to host MLS Cup 2015 ]

On Sunday, during halftime of the league’s Western Conference final, MLS commissioner Don Garber was asked about the Miami stadium situation, to which he responded, “We think Miami will be a great market. We found a reasonably good site. I’m confident that we’ll get something done there.”

MBU is reportedly being held to something of a deadline by the MLS board of governors, which meets every year ahead of MLS Cup, with this weekend’s sit-down thought of as a target date to have something concrete going forward. Meanwhile, Sacramento Republic FC, an MLS expansion hopeful currently playing in the USL (third division), announced last week they would be moving forward with building their brand new MLS-sized stadium, expansion bid or not.

“Goal” writer pitching a Jamie Vardy movie: But who would play Kaspar Schmeichel?

Jamie Vardy, Leicester City FC
AP Photo/Rui Vieira
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There are certainly already some comparisons between new Premier League record holder Jamie Vardy and fictional Santiago Munez from the “Goal!” movies.

But that isn’t going to stop “Goal” screenwriter Adrian Butchart from heading to Tinseltown and pitching the Vardy story as a basis for a new film, according to The Sun.

[ PL PLAYBACK: Vardy Party, and Costa out at Chelsea? ]

And he’s got a who’s who of young actors in mind for the role of Vardy.

From The Sun:

Butchart believes Hollywood A-listers Robert Pattinson, Andrew Garfield and Zac Efron all have potential to fill Vardy’s boots in a film version of his life.

Unfortunately, they don’t ask Butchart who should play Claudio Ranieri, or Ruud van Nistelrooy.

Fortunately, we’re here with our cast (The first one is easy):

Aaron Paul as Vardy.

Robert Downey, Jr. as Van Nistelrooy.

James Franco as Riyad Mahrez.

Tommy Lee Jones as Ranieri.

Ryan Gosling as Kaspar Schmeichel.

Liam Neeson as Nigel Pearson.

And Danny Drinkwater as himself.

Report says Impact will add 96-times capped Ivorian defender

Monaco's Bulgarian forward Dimitar Berbatov (L) challenges Montpellier's Ivorian defender Siaka Tiene (R) during the French L1 football match between Montpellier and Monaco at the Mosson stadium in Montpellier on September 24, 2014.   AFP PHOTO / BORIS HORVAT        (Photo credit should read BORIS HORVAT/AFP/Getty Images)
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The Eastern Conference’s second-stingiest team is looking to enhance its already-strong back line.

Joining MLS Best XI defender Laurent Ciman could be Siaka Tiene, a longtime international teammate of Didier Drogba on the Ivory Coast squad.

[ MORE: Timbers hold off Dallas | Crew advances past RBNY ]

The 96-times capped Tiene will be 34 when next season starts, but will have fresh legs having not played since last season ended for Montpellier. does the translation work for us:

A report from states that the Impact have signed 33-year-old left back Siaka Tiéné, an Ivory Coast international who boasts World Cup and African Cup of Nations experience.

Aside from Ciman, Ambroise Oyongo is the only Impact back currently under contract.

Tiene played relatively well last season, but was limited to just 17 appearances in Ligue 1.

Phil Neville takes over Valencia training; Could he get job?

VALENCIA, SPAIN - AUGUST 19:  Valencia CF assistant coach Phil Neville gestures prior to the UEFA Champions League Qualifying Round Play Off First Leg match between Valencia CF and AS Monaco at Mestalla Stadium on August 19, 2015 in Valencia, Spain.  (Photo by Manuel Queimadelos Alonso/Getty Images)
Photo by Manuel Queimadelos Alonso/Getty Images
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Phil Neville is one stroke of the pen from opening his full managerial career at a vaunted La Liga stop, with a club in the group stage of the UEFA Champions League.

Nuno Espirito Santo stepped down from his manager’s role at Valencia on Sunday, with the Bats in ninth place, five points outside the Top Four.

[ MORE: La Liga & Serie A roundup | Bundesliga wrap ]

In his place in former Manchester United and Everton legend Neville, who will take charge of the team in the interim.

As weird as it would be to give the job to a man who has only led Salford City — a club he co-owns — on a caretaker basis, the hire would be no weirder than Tim Sherwood being allowed to run Tottenham Hotspur.

Would it be a surprise, given the time of season, if Neville was at least given through the end of the year?

And consider, from the BBC:

The club’s Singaporean owner, Peter Lim, has a stake in Salford City, the non-league club co-owned by Neville with his former Manchester United team-mates Ryan Giggs, Gary Neville and Paul Scholes.

Valencia needs to beat Lyon in its final UCL Group H game, and hope Gent draws or loses at home to first-place Zenit Saint-Petersburg. Otherwise, it’s on to the Europa League.