D.C. United records watch; one step closer to dubious distinctions

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Ben Olsen made the right call Saturday, for sure, resting all his starters ahead of this week’s U.S. Open Cup final at Real Salt Lake.

Unfortunately the choice could also hasten D.C. United’s place toward history. Here is a quick look at those black marks that Olsen and Co. would surely prefer to avoid, some of the all-time worsts in league history — some of the sad benchmarks for MLS season-long futility:

(MORE: Resting its regular, United falls at Toronto FC)

  • Lowest winning percentage in a season

The 2001 Tampa Bay Mutiny finished with a wretched .185 winning percentage in the grim year before if went away (a 4-21-2 record). United’s current .150 percentage (3-21-6) is worse.

Uh, yeah. And the might need to win a couple to scoot by the league’s second lowest historic percentage yet; the 1999 MetroStars and 2005 Chivas USA was both at .219.

The good news is that three of United’s final four matches are at home. The bad news is that all three are against teams that are likely to be desperate for points; Chicago, Philadelphia and Houston all remain alive today in the playoff race.

Oh, United’s one road match is at Eastern Conference contender Sporting Kansas City. That’s hardly encouraging.

  • Fewest wins in a season

Again, the mark to beat belongs (in part) to that dismal 2001 Tampa Bay group, which won just four times. So did Chivas USA in 2005. (United, as noted in the record above, has three wins this year.)

  • Fewest wins on the road in a season

This one is in real jeopardy, although United will have plenty of company … and that is something, at least. Four clubs went an entire season without a road win. Vancouver, just two years back, was the most recent doing so. The 1999 Red Bulls never found a “W” on the road, either.

Not being able to field a competitive team in Toronto today really hurts here, because that’s one for which a full version may have had a shot, at least. Regardless, that coming match at Sporting Park on Oct. 18 is the Black and Red’s final opportunity. The team is 0-13-3 away from RFK Stadium (pictured above) currently.

  • Fewest goals in a season

Here’s one where United can surely get over the hump. With a goal on Saturday (a nice one at that), Olsen’s team has 20 this year. No, it’s not exactly the 98 Galaxy (85 goals, yo!), but the men of RFK need just two more to dodge further besmirch.

D.C. United’s 2010 team holds this particular dubious distinction with 21, back in the club’s previous, most woeful season.

So, four games to score two goals.

C’mon United! … You can do it!

  • Worst goal difference over a season

Uh, more bad news here. Because Saturday’s three-goal loss got Olsen’s sad bunch too close for comfort on this one.

The current miunus-32 goal difference is just four off record pace. Chivas USA in 2005 and Tampa Bay were both at minus-36 after their campaigns of misery. (By the way, the ‘keeper for that awful, first Chivas USA side … none other than current Aston Villa standout and U.S. international Brad Guzan. Just some trivia to lighten the mood; it is a bit dark in here, eh?)

AT HALF: Lukaku, Lingard have Man Utd up at West Brom (video)

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Romelu Lukaku didn’t celebrate much more than a fist pump following his match-opening goal against former teammates West Bromwich Albion.

[ MORE: Watch via NBCSports.com).

No one said anything about celebrating teammates’ goals, though.

Lukaku scored to give the Red Devils a 1-0 lead, then watched as Jesse Lingard‘s deflected lash left Ben Foster high and dry as United cruised into the break up two goals.

It’s 10th PL goal of the season for Lukaku, who has 15 in all competitions. For Lingard, it’s four and seven.

Here’s Lingard’s marker:

Celtic’s record unbeaten run ends at 69 matches

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Celtic’s unbeaten domestic run has ended at 69 matches, and it ended with a thud.

Tynecastle Park was the scene for a 4-0 thumping at the hands of Hearts, a defeat started by a 16-year-old’s first Scottish Premiership goal.

[ REPORT: Luiz done at Chelsea? ]

Harry Cochrane’s his name, and his 26th minute goal gave Hearts the lead, and it was 2-0 by halftime through Kyle Lafferty, the ex-Burnley and Norwich player.

David Milinkovic scored three minutes after halftime, as the wake-up call didn’t arrive at the break, and added a penalty kick late in the match.

Celtic has a two-point lead on second-place Aberdeen with a match-in-hand. Rangers sit five-points back.

Sixty-nine games! Remarkable in any league. Here’s what Rodgers had to say:

“But I also want to congratulate my players. To have gone through 69 games and this to be their first defeat; of course it’s a sore one when you are beaten like that but they can hold their heads up. They have been absolutely amazing over those 18 months.”

WATCH LIVE: West Brom vs. Manchester United

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The Hawthorns is the scene as Manchester United attempts to pull back into sole possession of second place on the Premier League table with a visit to West Bromwich Albion (Watch live at 9:15 a.m. ET on NBCSN and online via NBCSports.com).

WATCH LIVE, ONLINE, HERE

The Baggies have several regular starters on the bench, with Chris Brunt, Gareth Barry, and Gareth McAuley (Allllll the Gareths!) getting a rest.

United will hand starts to Jesse Lingard and Juan Mata, with Anthony Martial on the bench with Zlatan Ibrahimovic.

LINEUPS

West Bromwich Albion: Foster; Nyom, Hegazi, Evans, Gibbs, Krychowiak, Yacob, Livermore, Burke, McClean, Rondon. Subs: Myhill, Robson-Kanu, Brunt, Barry, Rodriguez, McAuley, Field.

Manchester United: De Gea; Valencia, Jones, Smalling, Young, Herrera, Matic, Mata, Lingard, Rashford, Lukaku. Subs: Romero, Lindelof, Rojo, Shaw, McTominay, Ibrahimovic, Martial.

Report: Luiz done at Chelsea, perhaps as soon as January

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A report out of England says Chelsea defender David Luiz could be out the door in January.

Luiz, 30, has a knee injury and has played in just one match for Chelsea since a Halloween loss to Roma in the Champions League, one that supposedly culminated in a blow-up between the defender and manager Antonio Conte.

He was sold once before by Chelsea, shipped to Paris Saint-Germain for $66 million in 2014 before returning to Stamford Bridge in 2016 for $45 million.

[ MAN CITY-SPURS: 3 things |  Studs and duds ]

Luiz has made just one appearance, a Nov. 22 match in Qarabag, since that Roma loss. He returned to the bench against Liverpool before being diagnosed with a knee injury.

The report says Juventus is a possible destination for Luiz, though the Champions League could be a problem for both sides. Luiz is Cup-tied to Chelsea, and Juventus remains in the UCL as well.

And Chelsea would need reinforcements at the back. It’s back three has operated with Andreas Christensen, Cesar Azpilicueta, and Gary Cahill. Other options are Antonio Rudiger and 20-year-old Jake Clarke-Salter, which would be fine were Chelsea not alive in four competitions (The League Cup quarterfinals have the Blues hosting Bournemouth on Wednesday).

The power seems a bit more in Luiz’s hands thanks to some of Conte’s sanctioned loans. Kurt Zouma has arguably been Stoke City’s most consistent performer in an under siege unit, one of 10 backs on season-long loans. The most sense is to find reconciliation, presuming the dust-up is real, and move on in the summer if necessary.