Quick six: Top stories from the Premier League weekend

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1. CITY AFFIRMED, SPURS EXPOSED IN ETIHAD ROUT

This is why Manchester City, despite all their inconsistencies, have never lost their status as title contenders. Though their inexplicably bad road form means they’re capable of losing to the likes of Sunderland, their peak performances say this is the best team in the Premier League. At least, occasionally.

Sunday was one of those days. A goal within 13 seconds from Jesus Navas sparked City to a 3-0 lead by halftime. They doubled that margin before the final whistle, with Navas and the league’s top marksman (Sergio Agüero) each bagging braces. After their 6-0 victory, City’s scored 10 more goals than anybody in the league. Their +22 difference is eight better than league-leading Arsenal’s.

[MORE: Manchester City 6-0 Tottenham Hotspur: 13-second goal leads to blowout at Etihad (video)]

The other side of this coin in Spurs’, a team for which there may not be enough panic buttons to push. Coming into this game, the one thing they have going for them was defense. So much for that. Now a team that can’t score also has questions in defense, and to this point, they also haven’t been able to win the big games. In matches against Arsenal, Chelsea, Everton, and City, Spurs have two points. They also have new reason to doubt André Villas-Boas can make Tottenham’s offseason makeover pay off.

2. DOSE OF REALITY FROM ARSENAL BRINGS SOUTHAMPTON BACK TO EARTH

And just like that, Southampton’s six back of first. Whereas Mauricio Pochettino’s team was within a win of the top on Saturday morning, now they’re only two points out of ninth – the thin margin between Cinderella story and level most expected them to play at three months ago.

[MORE: Arsenal 2-0 Southampton: Giroud double extends Gunners lead at the top (video)]

There’ll be some asterisks thrown around because of the nature of Arsenal’s goals, but (at the risk of sounding simplistic) better players don’t make those mistakes. True, Artur Boruc and Jose Fonte’s errors were more egregious than you’d expect, but the lesser quality players you have, to more likely you are to see random breakdowns occur. Saturday’s mistakes were an overly blunt reminder that Southampton aren’t quite at a title contender’s level.

Arsenal, on the other hand, did exactly what you’d expect when a league leader hosts an upstart. They weathered Saints’ early energy to produce two good chances before Boruc wilted. Forte’s shirt pull was an act of desperation from a team who’d been proven second best. Arsenal put their guests in a position to fail.

As a result, they’ve regained some of the cushion they lost with their defeat at Old Trafford, now up four points on the rest of the Premier League.

3. NO MERCY FOR KEEPERS IN DERBY SHOOTOUT

A lot of the ‘you throw form out the window’ homily about derbies serves as empty hype. Thankfully, Everton and Liverpool lived up to that bombast on Saturday, their Merseyside Derby serving up six goals in what became the match of the weekend. After Daniel Sturridge’s 89th minute equalizer, both teams were left with a point after the season’s first derby at Goodison Park.

[MORE: Everton 3-3 Liverpool: Plenty of drama in the Merseyside Derby (video)]

Liverpool should feel much better then their rivals about this result. Everton forced Simon Mignolet into nine saves on the day, and if it wasn’t for the Toffees two set piece breakdowns in the first 20 minutes, that onslaught would have been enough to see the hosts take three points. But their failure to track Philippe Coutinho on a fifth minute corner cost them, as did their inability to set up an effective wall on Luis Suárez’s 19th minute free kick. All three Liverpool goals came off set pieces.

For most of the day, Everton was the better side, but their inability to cover the basics meant Liverpool were just as strong on the scoresheet, one which saw three goals from the Toffees’ Belgian stars (Kevin Miralles, Romelu Lukaku (two)) pulled back at Goodison. While Everton could comfort themselves in their overall play, but already up to six draws this season, the Toffees should be concerned that form didn’t produce three points. Sometimes moral victories aren’t victories at all.

4. ONE STEP FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK FOR MANCHESTER UNITED

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Kim Bo-Kyung celebrates his 91st minute equalizer, giving Cardiff City a 2-2 draw with visiting Manchester United. (Source: Getty Images.)

Again, it’s not that Manchester United dropped points, this time at Cardiff City. It’s how it happened. Up 2-1 in stoppage time, the Red Devils gave up an equalizer to Kim Bo-Kyung, set piece defending costing them two points after a foul by Chris Smalling.

[MORE: Cardiff City 2-2 Manchester United: Kim header in stoppage time shares points]

In isolation, the point isn’t a bad one, but there are going to be other times this year when Manchester United will have to fight for the same result. On the road against a team they should beat, they’ll concede on a corner or have a penalty go against them. They’ll need to scrounge for their point. It happens.

When you’re ahead, though? When you have not one but two leads? Against an inferior team? Yes, that happens, too, but United also let Southampton steal late points at Old Trafford. They also gave up a late goal to Shakhtar in Champions League, and West Brom was able to take full points in Manchester with a 67th minute winner.

Before the break, Manchester United was being lauded for their progress, having just knocked off Arsenal. This week, they regressed, and while that ebb and flow is bound to happen with any team, it also shows are still very much a work in progress.

5. THE LINGERING FEAR CHELSEA WILL FIGURE THINGS OUT

Chelsea beat West Ham, 3-0. To a certain extent that was expected. Perhaps we didn’t know the Blues would roll out three-goal winners, but nobody was really surprised. Thanks to a Frank Lampard special (penalty kick, last goal of a rout), Chelsea is even with Liverpool on points, both clubs four points behind Arsenal.

[MORE: West Ham 0-3 Chelsea: Lampard leads Blues to dominant win (video)]

That’s a fearfully narrow gap for a league that’s let one of the league’s two most-talented sides dilly-dally for 12 rounds and stay on the fringe of the title race while playing below their potential. On Saturday, the Blues shifted back to a 4-3-3 (type of) formation and produced a romp, and while it clearly wasn’t the stiffest test in the world (breaking: West Ham aren’t good right now), it was a more decisive victory than we’re used to seeing from this transitioning team.

At some point, that transition will be over. Same thing with Manchester City. These are the two most-talented teams in England, and they’ve barely been made to pay for their uneven starts. If these teams start clicking, it will be difficult for Arsenal to keep up.

6. RED CARDS: LESS RHYME, LESS REASON

Debates over red cards can be somewhat tedious. Like penalties, they’re refuge for disgruntled fans whose tinged lenses make judgment calls into evidence of bias. In truth, they’re just one of the variables we should accept, if not outright expect. You have to know some calls just aren’t going to go your way. Your team has 90 minutes to make up for it.

Consider that a caveat, because this weekend was a particularly inconsistent one in the Premier League. Wes Brown was sent off without touching a man, and Kevin Mirallas stayed on despite a truly reckless play on Luis Suárez. As Rebecca Lowe, Robbie Earle, and Robbie Mustoe imply, it’s less about how these calls effected their games (though Gus Poyet is rightfully furious) than trying to figure out what’s going on here:

I don’t begrudge people their red card debates, but when it comes to player health, there should not room for compromise. Wins, losses, and anything else that happens within the competitive part of the game are secondary to maintaining an environment when players don’t have to seriously worry about their knees being blown out.

If you want to tell me Wes Brown’s challenge crosses that line, I’m more than willing to listen (I’ll agree with the logic, not the application). If he makes contact, that could have been bad. But in the same thought we need to recognize Kevin Mirallas should have been gone. The world where that’s a permissible challenge is not one we want to watch.

Liverpool’s murky Top Four path depends on Manchester United

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Liverpool is a historic club with incredible presence. Jurgen Klopp is a celebrated manager with a strong reputation as a players’ coach.

Those two facets will always make the club attractive to players. Missing out on the UEFA Champions League is another thing altogether and would put a huge dent in Klopp’s ambitious recruitment goals.

And right now, the Reds look destined to drop out of the Top Four.

[ JPW: Oriol Romeu — The Perfectly Poised Destroyer ]

Team GP W D L GF GA GD Home Away PTS
 Chelsea 32 24 3 5 65 27 38 13-0-2 11-3-3 75
 Tottenham Hotspur 32 21 8 3 68 22 46 15-2-0 6-6-3 71
 Liverpool 34 19 9 6 70 42 28 11-4-2 8-5-4 66
 Manchester City 32 19 7 6 63 35 28 8-6-1 11-1-5 64
 Manchester United 32 17 12 3 50 24 26 7-9-1 10-3-2 63
 Everton 34 16 10 8 60 37 23 12-4-1 4-6-7 58
 Arsenal 31 17 6 8 63 40 23 10-3-2 7-3-6 57

Even if Manchester United and Manchester City draw Thursday’s derby, both will be poised to pass the Reds by winning the match-in-hand.

Injury-ravaged United is bothered by UEFA Europa League duty against Celta Vigo, and has a brutal run-in that includes Spurs and Arsenal in addition to City. Liverpool has to hope United falls off, because Man City is likely going to walk over the Top Four line even with a draw in the derby.

The worst case scenario for Liverpool, aside from continuing to flail against clubs outside the Top Seven, is United toppling City on Thursday.

As an aside, it’s extremely unlikely that Arsenal leaps into the fray but if the Gunners did it would come at the expense of United.

Really, Liverpool’s run-in is perfectly built for two of its supporters’ favorite things: Winning matches and rooting against Manchester United. Here’s how they finish:

May 1 — at Watford
May 7 — vs. Southampton
May 14 — at West Ham United
May 21 — vs. Middlesbrough

Liverpool battered Watford 6-1 at Anfield and Boro 3-0 at the Riverside Stadium, but drew both Saints and West Ham earlier this season in addition to losing to Southampton in an EFL Cup semifinal.

Say the Reds nab a perfect 12 points to finish with 78; They’ll need City to take less than 14 from six remaining matches and United to earn less than 15 from six. The latter is far more likely than the former, but will matter very little if Klopp can’t motivate and organize his men in the final four matches.

Schweinsteiger shares thoughts on MLS, much more in lengthy interview

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Ambassadors responsible for Bastian Schweinsteiger‘s move to America extend deep into the 1970s.

1977 to be exact. That’s when Franz Beckenbauer first came to the New York Cosmos from Bayern Munich, a three-season tenure that went so well he returned to New York for his final professional season after time with Hamburg.

[ PL PREVIEW: Chelsea vs. Southampton ]

Schweinsteiger said Beckenbauer’s words meant a lot to him, and admitted that he’s not imparting that wisdom to other overseas players who ask him about MLS.

From TSN.ca (Full video here):

“I remember when David Beckham was playing here or even I know when Franz Beckenbauer was playing here, and I was talking to him and he said he had his best life in America,” Schweinsteiger said. “We spoke about it and I was thinking about it a little bit.For me it was a little bit different because I love to play soccer and in Manchester I couldn’t play enough soccer so that was the problem.”

Among several interesting soundbites from the interview with Schweinsteiger also spoke about Germany’s memorable destruction of host nation Brazil at the 2014 World Cup:

“I remember the semifinal that we won 7-1. Everyone speaks about the 7-1, but we were not talking so much about it because we felt very, in a way, sad, because you saw your teammates like Dante and Luis Gustavo and the Brazilian supporters and the team crying, so you couldn’t really celebrate. Our focus was so much looking forward to the final. I remember things like this, sometimes more than the final.”

Not something you consider often. Winning a match 2-1 against your club teammates is one thing, but sending them to international humiliation is another.

Oriol Romeu: The perfectly poised destroyer

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SOUTHAMPTON — A two-hour drive on a straight highway along the coast of Catalonia in Spain, the road from Ulldecona to Barcelona is not as easy to navigate as you might think.

Ask Southampton’s star performer this season, Oriol Romeu.

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Currently reaching levels he admits he wasn’t sure he could ever reach, the 25-year-old midfielder is nailed on to be named Saints’ player of the season and as he prepares to head back to his former club Chelsea on Tuesday (Watch live, 2:45 p.m. ET on NBCSN and online via NBCSports.com) the combative Catalan has been reflecting on his journey to the Premier League.

Speaking exclusively to Pro Soccer Talk on a sunny day on England’s South Coast, it was another coastal route which Romeu and his family got extremely used to navigating in his days with Espanyol as a youngster.

“It’s 200 kilometers from Barcelona, so quite far,” Romeu said of his hometown, Ulldecona. “It was a bit tough in the beginning because I had to travel a lot and my parents were a bit scared to spend too long on the road. When I was 12 I decided I wanted to go back home and wanted to stop playing football at a big level. Suddenly Barcelona came and said ‘we like you, we want you to be here and we don’t won’t you to go away’ and I said ‘okay, I will accept’ because obviously I love Barcelona and that was a chance I had to take. It went well. It went very well and I was very lucky to develop since the first day and I could become a good player. It was tough because I was too far away from home and I had to travel a lot. It wasn’t easy but I could make it.”

And make it he has.

Given Romeu’s steady ascent over the past 12 months where he first shadowed Victor Wanyama, Saints’ chief midfield destroyer at the time, and then shone at the back-end of last season, we’ve had a chat penciled in many times over recent months but due to his schedule or mine it has never quite worked out. Yet now, ahead of Romeu’s return to Chelsea, it seemed like the perfect time to discuss his rise at Southampton in the midst of the finest season in his career so far.

[ VIDEO: Premier League highlights

“Finally, we can meet!” Romeu says, smiling as he walks through the door at Southampton’s training base at Staplewood. Sporting tattoos on the inside of his arms, Romeu places his wash bag and a light jacket down on the table as we catch up and discuss his plans for the afternoon.

Q&A with @nbcsports and @jpw_nbcsports today. Thanks for your questions! 😉 #saintsfc #southamptonfc

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He explains that his dogs will be waiting by the door for him when he gets home and then he’ll set off on a long evening walk across one of the many stunning vistas within close proximity to his home in southern England. It gives him a chance to relax and switch off, he explains, as his life off the pitch is far from what you would expect for a powerful central midfielder who used to showcase a mean Mohawk hairdo.

Calm, collected and poised as he juggles a bottle of water while we talk, Romeu has had a long and winding journey to become a regular in the Premier League.

That journey has taken him to three countries, six clubs and the hugely likable Romeu seems to know so many people in the game. After Saints’ preseason friendly with Espanyol he was holding court with coaches and players in the tunnel area and the likes of Juan Mata and Fernando Torres are close friends, while following a recent home defeat to Manchester City his former boss Pep Guardiola spent several minutes speaking with him outside the locker rooms at St Mary’s.

Romeu made his way through the famed La Masia academy after deciding to stick it out in Barcelona after those tough early years and played under Guardiola for the team he grew up supporting. In his hometown of Ulldecona he idolized Brazilian legend Ronaldo and was a true Barca fan.

“My parents always say that I was a bit mad for Ronaldo” Romeu smiles. He even played up front in his early days as he looked to emulate Ronaldo yet Romeu sheepishly admits that scoring goals quickly became an afterthought in his game.

A move to Chelsea in 2011 saw Romeu’s career take a huge step forward as he played regularly under Andre Villas-Boas but with injuries hampering his progress at Stamford Bridge and after two loan moves to Valencia and Stuttgart, it’s at Southampton where he’s found his feet. Big time. A true fans favorite at St Mary’s in just his second season at Saints, Romeu is both the midfield organizer and destroyer.

His brute force is backed up by a growing intelligence to read the game and time interceptions to perfection. He has made the third-highest amount of tackles for midfielders in the Premier League, behind only Idrissa Gueye and N'Golo Kante, and also ranks sixth in the PL for most interceptions by a midfielder.

Romeu was rewarded for his fine displays by signing a new long-term contract in January, on the eve of what he calls his favorite moment in his career so far. He put in a man of the match display as Southampton beat Liverpool at Anfield to secure a place in the EFL Cup final at Wembley.

“The favorite moment of my career was that semifinal at Anfield when we beat Liverpool away. That was my happiest day as a footballer,” Romeu smiled, again. “We played amazing football and we got to a final and along with the fans we were all there enjoying and playing against a top side like Liverpool. That’s the top moment in my career. When Longy [Shane Long] scored, we all went mad! Fighting for that final, it was so close and if they scored it would be going to extra time. So when he scored it was one of the happiest moments of my career, no doubt.”

This season there’s no doubt it has been the best of his career and Romeu credits this to his growing confidence as he plays week in, week out in Southampton’s midfield. He’s been named Southampton’s Player of the Month on three occasions by the fans as he led their charge to a heroic EFL Cup final defeat, plus a historic campaign which saw them go within one goal of reaching the knockout stages of the UEFA Europa League after Romeu dominated Inter Milan in a famous win at St Mary’s.

Even after losing to Man United in the EFL Cup final, just when Saints seemed to be destined to win their first major trophy in over 40 years, Romeu chooses to take the positives from that experience.

“We hope that we can play at Wembley many times,” Romeu said. “It was a day that straight after we didn’t have a good feeling. But looking back now after a couple of months, it was a day to remember. We all had a very, very good feeling playing in that stadium. There was an amazing connection with our fans and since that day we have started to play better football and the fans started to realize we are trying to do our best. We didn’t win, we didn’t get the title we wanted, but there are so many positives to take.”

In the aftermath of that defeat, Romeu was inconsolable on the Wembley pitch as tears poured down his face as he wore the captain’s armband.

He and his teammates had given everything and with the score locked at 2-2 in the 62nd minute, he beat Paul Pogba to a header from a corner but the ball hit the post and was cleared. If Romeu’s header had gone in, there would not have been a more fitting scorer of a cup-winning goal for Southampton, especially at the exact same time as Saints’ fans were also lighting up their end of Wembley with a tribute to their savior and former owner Markus Liebherr who passed away at the age of 62.

Romeu’s song is sung with gusto each and every game by Southampton’s fans and the Catalan admitted he’s never received that kind of adulation anywhere else in his career.

When Romeu steps out onto the pitch against his old club Chelsea on Tuesday — he is once again available after a two-game ban for picking up 10 yellow cards this season — he’s no longer a kid from Catalan among Chelsea’s superstar squad. He’s a beast from Ullcedona who is capable of dominating their midfield.

Romeu credited current Saints boss Claude Puel (who was also a midfield destroyer in his playing days) with improving his game since he arrived last summer as he made the Spaniard a key part of his team.

“He is always trying to help me with the structure of the team. As a midfielder you always have players around yourself. If I can help the team to get tactically ready, it helps the team a lot,” Romeu explained. “We know in this league that sometimes the team gets unorganized and everyone is out of their place. Basically, in me he wants to have someone who makes sure everyone is back in their place and the team is ready to go again. Apart from having that faith in me and playing me in so many games, he is always trying to teach me in different parts of my game.”

Puel has recently compared Romeu to another Frenchman as his talents start to become widely appreciated alongside a growing number of holding midfielders in the Premier League who are garnering added respect. The likes of Kante at Chelsea, Gueye at Everton, Ander Herrera at Manchester United and Wanyama at Tottenham have all become integral for their respective teams.

In the summer of 2015 Leicester City had two options when looking to buy a new holding midfielder: Kante or Romeu.

Kante went to Leicester and Romeu went to Southampton and both proved to be fine signings. Romeu admitted that when Saints signed him in 2015 he was not at the best moment in his career and was struggling after a loan spell at Stuttgart. He has more than repaid the faith Saints showed in him to help him rebuild his career.

Both Kane and Romeu will do battle in the center of midfield at Stamford Bridge on Tuesday and with Kante named the PFA Player of the Year on Sunday for his fine destructive displays in midfield, Romeu’s manager believes his midfield destroyer is close to Kante’s level.

“N’Golo Kante brings the same qualities as Oriol Romeu for us. Without Kante it is difficult for Chelsea. Without Romeu it is difficult for us. For me, Oriol is not far off Kante,” Puel explained. “He is very consistent. Every game he gives a good performance and is strong on the recovery of the ball. He has a lot of qualities to also start on the ball and for me, he is at the same level. He’s a great player for me. But for the moment we cannot play for the first place of the table and he is not on the TV, but we will see for the future. For me he can go also to the selection with Spain for example.”

Representing Spain is also at the forefront of Romeu’s mind as a former coach of his at national team youth levels was Julen Lopetegui, the current head coach of the Spanish national team.

“As a footballer it is one of your dreams,” Romeu said. “When you are younger you see the national team playing and you say ‘oh, hopefully one day’ but it seems so far away. Now, honestly, I am feeling very good and the coach from the national team has been training with me in the U-23s. He knows the way I am and if he wants me to go there, I feel like I am ready to go. We will see what happens.”

A thoughtful individual who can often be found reading books in his spare time, beating everyone at table-tennis and even darts in the team lounge, Romeu allowed his mind to wander back to when he first arrived in England at Chelsea almost six years ago. Things were very different.

He admitted, perhaps surprisingly, than he’s even surprised himself as to how far he’s come since then.

“I see myself playing matches a few years ago and now I try different things and do different things, I’ve tried to learn to obviously get better and to be one step ahead. This year while I’m playing, I’m even discovering new things about myself because I’m playing on a level that I probably wasn’t expecting before,” Romeu smiled. “Before, I wasn’t feeling that I could do the things that I am doing now. It’s time to see how far I can go. I just want to keep going and see how long it will last. I’m feeling good.”

Romeu’s club and his teammates are in a very similar position.

Each and every season Southampton have been written off after selling on key names – Wanyama, Sadio Mane and Graziano Pelle were the latest to exit last summer – but somehow they dig deep to grind out more from each player and secure a top 10 finish. This season, with new manager Puel at the helm, Saints are on course for their fourth-straight top 10 finish in the Premier League after competing in the Europa League and reaching a major cup final.

Puel has hailed Romeu’s importance to Southampton’s future.

“He learned with Barcelona and we can see this. He feels the play and feels the game with passes disguised and quality on the pitch,” Puel said. “He is very important in our start of the play. I like this.”

What’s the next step for Saints and Romeu? To challenge for a UEFA Champions League spot?

Romeu hopes that is achievable in the next “three or four years” at Southampton.

“That would be the main target. Definitely. That would be something so nice,” Romeu said, puffing out his cheeks. “There are teams, even top teams this year, that are struggling to get there. You need to be very, very consistent and have a very, very strong team. We will see if we can get that. Looking at our team now, if all the players injured were okay and if everyone playing is in his best moment, we will have a very strong side. Hopefully we can keep building into this structure that we have in this team and can get even better next year.”

Although there’s still a tinge of disappointment at Southampton that they couldn’t get past Manchester United at Wembley to seal Europa League action for a third-straight season, Romeu believes the potential to not have European games next season could be a blessing in disguise.

“We are seeing recently that the teams that are not playing in Europe, they feel better in the league and get in better positions at the end of the season. Last year with Leicester and this year with Chelsea,” Romeu said. “So we need to take that part of next year as something good, not something negative.”

Always positive after coming through plenty of testing times at home and abroad, Romeu is far from the end of his journey. Southampton is certainly glad a young midfielder decided to keep making those journey from one side of Catalonia to the other nearly 15 years ago.

Ahead of his return to Chelsea he is, as ever, reflective about his days at Stamford Bridge as a youngster. Perhaps the biggest compliment which can be paid to him is that Chelsea fans often flood social media feeds discussing Romeu’s displays with comments such as ‘why did you leave Chelsea?’ and ‘come back to Chelsea, Oriol.’

“It was probably a learning period of time. I was very young and I was sharing a dressing room with amazing players, idols for me then and now. I could learn a lot from them, the way they approached games and trained on a daily basis. It was a very good period. I was very happy to be there [at Chelsea]. To go back there it is nice and it will be good to play against some players I have a good relationship with and I get on with very well. It is always nice to go back there and play against them… and hopefully beat them!” Romeu laughed. “I think Chelsea have done amazingly and they are in the best position. They cannot relax. This league does not allow you to bring your level down one step.”

Romeu has taken his level up several steps and he shows no signs of stopping that climb now.

Pardew laments firing, credits Palace turnaround to new players

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Alan Pardew knows why Crystal Palace was failing when he got fired, knows he could’ve fixed it, and seems pretty bummed he’s not there any more.

Pardew emerged to make the comments after Sam Allardyce helmed another upset win for Palace, a 2-1 win over Liverpool which joins defeats of Arsenal and Chelsea.

The win moves Palace 12th, and the Eagles have a legitimate shot at a top-half finish despite their poor start to the season. But Pardew wants fans to know it was about a personnel mistake, and that Palace dropped into the relegation zone after he was fired.

[ PL PREVIEW: Chelsea vs. Southampton ]

The Northeast Chronicle says Pardew aimed to bring former Newcastle left backs Davide Santon and Paul Dummett to Palace, but couldn’t get the moves over the line. Then Pape Souare was hurt in a car accident and Palace was in trouble.

Over to you, Pards (From the Chronicle’s Lee Ryder):

“We were kicking ourselves not to have any left-footed cover. We were playing right-footed players there and things were exploiting that situation. We became one dimensional.

“I was really disappointed I didn’t get to the window because Sam Allardyce followed me and the results didn’t really improve until the new players got bedded in and they made a big difference.”

Allardyce brought in Patrick Van Aanholt from Sunderland and Jeff Schlupp from Leicester to shore up the left side.

The story is made more amusing by the fact that Allardyce has not hesitated to make Palace’s return to form almost exclusively about his influence, while Pardew bleeds the very same blood.

Who’s on first?