Bundesliga Report: Bayern knock in seven, Dortmund fall to Leverkusen

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Goals! Goals! Goals galore! Ok, the majority of this weekend’s Bundesliga goals came courtesy of top side Bayern Munich. But that doesn’t mean the rest of the matches didn’t hold a bit of fun. Let’s take a peek.

Friday

Nurnberg 1-1 Mainz
Nurnberg wasted a chance to lift themselves up, well, not quite out of the danger zone, but at least to give themselves the opportunity to get out of the drop. Instead Per Nilsson’s fifth minute goal was canceled out by a 75th minute goal from Shinji Okazaki. Now Nurnberg remain in the relegation zone, with Mainz up in seventh.

Saturday

Borussia Mönchengladbach 2-1 Schalke 04
The visitors got things started with a penalty converted by Jefferson Farfán, but that was the brightest part of the day for Schalke. Raffael had things level by the 24th minute, and then Schalke went to pieces just before the break. Benedikt Höwedes picked up a second yellow for a handball inside the area and Max Kruse had no trouble putting Gladbach ahead with his conversion. The hosts were unable to capitalize on their man advantage in the second half, but that shouldn’t worry them much — especially since now they’re even with rivals Dortmund.

Eintracht Frankfurt 1-2 Hoffenheim
Eintracht are now just barely out of the relegation zone thanks to their performance against Hoffenheim. All the goals came inside five minutes: Sven Schipplock opened the scoring for the visitors, Joselu put Eintracht back on level terms, and three minutes later, Roberto Firmino sealed all three points for Hoffenheim.

Hamburg 0-1 Augsburg
Raul Bobadilla scored before 20 minutes were up, but, perhaps surprisingly, the visitors didn’t back off. Another goal never came but that’s ok. Augsburg are now eighth in the table, whereas Hamburg are 13th.

Stuttgart 4-2 Hannover
The two sides started the second half all even at 2-2. Martin Harnik and Vedad Ibišević scored for the hosts, Artur Sobiech and Salif Sané for the visitors. But, despite plenty of changes for Hannover in the second half, it was Stuttgart that came away with the win, with Ibrahima Traoré scoring the third and Konstantin Rausch putting it out of reach.

Werder Bremen 0-7 Bayern Munich
Wait, you really want all seven goalscorers for Bayern? Here goes. Werder Bremen kicked things off with an own goal from Assani Lukimya, and then the floodgates opened. Daniel van Buyten put in another six minutes later, and Franck Ribéry had Bayern up 3-0 by the break. Mario Mandžukić put in the first of the second half, Thomas Müller another seven minutes after, Ribéry grabbed a second and Mario Götze put the angel on the top of the Christmas tree with the seventh, in the 90th minute. Bayern: still unbeatable.

Borussia Dortmund 0-1 Bayer Leverkusen
Leverkusen stretched their second-place lead over Dortmund to six points with a win at the Westfalenstadion. The goal, from Heung-Min Son, came in the 18th minute, and from that point on, the visitors’ primary objective was to make sure Dortmund didn’t score. Mission: accomplished. But now Dortmund have even more to worry about ahead of their final Champions League match against Marseille, with both Sven Bender and Nuri Sahin leaving the match with injury.

Sunday

Freiburg vs. Wolfsburg
Three points would lift Freiburg out of the danger zone. Three points against a side sitting in sixth. Have fun with that, Freiburg.

Braunschweig vs. Hertha Berlin
Hertha may have struggled a bit in recent weeks, but it seems highly unlikely that they’ll lose to bottom side Braunschweig, who have just eight points on the season.

Chivas Guadalajara wins 12th Liga MX title

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A nail-biting finish saw Chivas Guadalajara lift the 2016/17 Liga MX title, beating Apertura champions Tigres to earn the club’s 12th Liga MX title.

The title makes Guadalajara the joint-most successful club in Mexican top flight history, even with Club America on titles.

With the aggregate score at 2-2 coming into the second leg at Chivas Stadium, the home side took the lead on an 18th minute expert finish by former Tigres youth product Alan Pulido. Oswaldo Alanís delivered a brilliant deep, looping ball to the far post, and under one-on-one pressure with a defender, Pulido struck it first-time and buried the ball into the far corner.

The game waited until midway through the second half for the next strike, as the eventual winner would fall to Jose Vazquez. The 29-year-old charged down a bounding ball that Tigres failed to clear, and his effort on net took a sizeable deflection off the midsection of a visiting defender, leaving the ball to trickle in uncontested.

Despite a 4-2 aggregate lead, it was by no means comfortable down the stretch for Chivas. Tigres pulled one back in the 88th minute on a fabulous strike by Ismael Sosa from just outside the top of the box. The visitors pressed for a stunning late equalizer, but it wasn’t to be.

The title is sweet for Chivas, who has endured a decade of struggles since winning its last championship, even coming close to relegation at times. In addition, the starting lineup for the second leg was fully domestic from top to bottom, with all 11 players from Mexico. On that same note, Pulido outdueled expensive Tigres striker Andre-Pierre Gignac, putting in on of the most impressive shifts of the match.

MLS Snapshot: FC Dallas 0-0 Houston Dynamo

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The game in 100 words (or less): The goalkeepers starred as the first Texas derby of the season ended goalless in Frisco, leaving both teams winless for at least three matches. A relatively slow start to the match gave way to an electric pace before halftime, as both goalkeepers made incredible saves, and FC Dallas had a goal correctly ruled out for offside. The second half saw two more fantastic stops, and each team had little else to offer the game.

Three moments that mattered

27′ – A pair of incredible saves, one on each end. In a game that had slogged through the opening half-hour and just seen FC Dallas defender Walker Zimmerman off injured, the match sprung to life. First, Kellyn Acosta delivered a beautiful free-kick from just off-center to the right. Tyler Deric was there, acrobatically reaching the top-right corner with his fingertips to deny the USMNT youngster. The save was so good, Acosta appeared to be prematurely celebrating a goal before he was forced to pull up after seeing the stop.

Then, immediately down the other end, Alberth Elis charged down a loose ball and ripped a shot on net, but Jesse Gonzalez produced an equally stunning save to keep the game scoreless.

66′ – FC Dallas dominated the opening stages of the second half, but they’d need their goalkeeper again to keep the score level. Alex delivered a dangerous cross from the left flank, and while it went over the head of Cubo Torres, it fell to Mauro Manoutas sliding in at the back post who met it on the slide. Unfortunately for Houston, Gonzalez was in the right place to make an admittedly awkward save.

80′ – In a 0-0 game, with no goals to speak of, the loudest cheer of the night was for Mauro Diaz. The 26-year-old made his return from an Achillies tear, subbing on with 10 minutes remaining for the first time since early August. He received a standing ovation from the FC Dallas home crowd.

Honorable mention – Kellyn Acosta delivered this eye-popping through-ball just before halftime. Feast your eyes.

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Man of the match: Jesse Gonzalez

Goalscorers: None

Championship Playoff Final preview: Huddersfield Town vs. Reading

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These two teams weren’t supposed to be here, at Wembley on Monday at 10:00 a.m. ET playing for a spot in the Premier League.

Everyone talked about how beautiful Fulham played. Everyone talked about how Sheffield kept on winning. Everyone kept talking about the favorites. Everyone wrote off the other guys.

Yet here we are. Reading, owner of a +4 goal differential. Huddersfield Town, owner of a -2 goal differential. Reading, winners over Fulham thanks to a bogus handball. Huddersfield, on to Wembley after a penalty shootout in the rain.

Here we are. The game that will catapult one team to the riches of the Premier League, the game that will send another team back to the depths of the Championship, consigned to progress with the heartbreak of knowing they were so close.

[ MORE: USMNT roster announced for upcoming World Cup qualifiers ]

The Championship playoff final is one of the biggest enigmas in the European soccer landscape. Teams like Reading looking to return to familiar lands of plentiful bounty, others like Huddersfield looking for glory never experienced before.

Huddersfield has not seen top flight action since 1972, and former American international David Wagner has them on the precipice. “There were a lot of statements before the semi-finals about momentum and about form,” Wagner said. “It is another example where we have proven that experience and what has happened in the past is irrelevant. After the 120 minutes against Sheffield Wednesday there were a lot of tired legs, but now after a training camp in Portugal and training on the grass here, everybody is ready to go.”

As far as form goes, Town is struggling. They drew both legs of the Sheffield Wednesday playoff semifinal 0-0, and finished the regular season on a three-match losing streak. They haven’t won a match since April 14th.

Reading, meanwhile, finished the year with wins in seven of their final nine regular season games, and they downed an attacking Fulham side 1-0 at home in the second leg of their semifinal. They’ve been stellar at winning close games all year, winning 18 regular season games by just a single goal, and losing just four, with seven draws. If Jaap Stam can lead his side back to the Premier League, it would mark just a four-year turnaround from their previous relegation from the top flight.

Riches await the winner. The sides couldn’t be more different, and yet on Monday, they both face the same brick wall.

Epic fake injury mars Hungarian league title match

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Sometimes it works out perfectly. Two teams, a title on the line, one match to decide it.

The top two teams in the Hungarian top flight, also known as the NB I, were set to play each other on the final day of the season to decide the title winner.

Budapest Honved hosted Videoton, with the winner set to win the league title. A draw would have given Videoton the victory on goal differential.

With the match 0-0 at halftime, it progressed tensely through the second half. So tense, in fact, that the teams felt they needed to do everything in their power to earn an edge. Even fake injuries. Terribly.

34-year-old Videoton striker Danko Lazovic, a veteran who has been around Europe with Zenit St. Petersburg, Bayer Leverkusen, and a host of Eredivisie teams,  looked to earn a foul in the attacking half. He put so much effort into selling the foul that, well, he went a little overboard. And by a little overboard, we mean he went berserk on the field, rolling around and flailing on his back.

There are many factors that make this an absolutely epic moment. First, his team had already earned a foul without the dive. The referee had blown the whistle for a shove moments before Lazovic went down. Second, his teammate looks to come over and help him sell the foul a little more realistically, and instead of accept his teammate’s assistance, he shrugs off the help and continues to flail. Third, as karma would have it, Honved would score the title-winning goal six minutes later as they would go on to win 1-0.

Kids, don’t try this at home. It’s not a good look.