Bad hairstyles in soccer? Yeah, we’ve seen a few

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I once read in Esquire Magazine that no group comes attached to worse hairstyles than men in government. Since I make a point to limit my own comments on hair and coifs and such (ahem) I tend to take Esky at its word.

But holy-moly-me-oh-my, I think we have a challenger to the throne. Good readers of ProSoccerTalk, I present to you from Complex Magazine, The 25 Ugliest Haircuts in Soccer History.

Enjoy.

(You may want to ask the women and children to avert their eyes; some of these images border on the disturbing.)

Big thanks to the clever Noah Davis, who has written for The Wall Street Journal, Goal.com, MLSSoccer.com, NYMag, Wired.com and a whole bunch of other folks, for pointing us toward this bit of time-kill brilliance. (Noah is also an A+ driver when it comes to the intimidating art of steering the wheels on the “wrong” side of the road; I was a passenger one afternoon as he deftly negotiated the tricky highways and byways of South Africa, safely delivering himself and a bunch of fellow journos during World Cup 2010. Well done, young man.)

(Update: I’m a complete cottonheaded ninnymuggins. I thanked Noah Davis for directing me to the list. It got by me, like Meola at the near post, that Noah actually compiled the list. My bad. Even more props extended.)

Names you might find particularly interesting listed among the very Worst Hairstyles: David Beckham, Brek Shea, Tony Meola and Clint Mathis back in his unfortunate Mohawk phase. (Don’t listen to ‘em, Juan Agudelo; your new hawk rocks.)

For me, laments only that bleach blonde-Landon Donovan somehow escaped the list. I’m sure Landon would appreciate a do-over on that one.