I honestly wish I had a few hours to write some sweeping words of effusive praise for the peerless wonder that is Leo Messi. (Not to mention a few more pretty words for his weapons grade, uranium depleted ordinance of a soccer club.) But what’s left to say after Wednesday’s performance, a five-goal dandy for their talisman as FC Barcelona blew by Bayer Leverkusen like some stationary obstacle along the M-45 motorway in Spain?
Final score: Barcelona 7-1. Or 10-2 on aggregate, if you prefer. Those are scores you see on the schoolboy grounds. This is no pushover they pushed around the overjoyed Nou Camp; Bayer Leverkusen is fifth in the quality Bundesliga.
Messi’s five strikes represents a record in Champions League competition.
Alas I don’t have time to write something of this sort. Nothing that could do that performance justice, at any rate. Then again, I don’t have to. You did a good job already. Here’s what you, the mesmerized supporters watching Barcelona’s boy wonder, had to say via Twitter (along with some help from a few be-Twittered journos) …
Seriously can’t give #Messi enough praise, another dink, another goal, another hat-trick. The man isn’t human, what a player – @rspencer100
At Barca, they didn’t even cheer that third goal – everyone just stood up and applauded! Amazing player. – @symo14
48 goals in 42 games. He’s still improving around the greens as well. #dink #chip #golfanalogy #messi – @arlowhite
#Messi may be the best player in the world and potentially the greatest ever… This accolade under-rates him. – @assassinalgebra
It’s a privilege to watch #Messi, heard about the likes of Pele and Maradona but never saw them play, can you be TOO good at football?!? – @munkeyfc
If you thought the fight among Leverkusen players for Messi’s jersey was fierce after the first leg…. #FIVEmoregoals – @AviCreditor
We (England) have nobody who can or ever will get near the level of Lionel messi. He’s simply outrageous. #talent #Messi – @matt_edmeades
Messi: giving you more chips than Mrs. Fields, Nestle & Tollhouse combined since 2004. – @MLS_Insider
Honestly he is the greatest, thankfully I live in a time that I can watch him #messi #fcb – @DarrenArsenal1
Messi is doing things you can’t do in FIFA 12. – @noahedavis
#itv commentator Townsend: “Messi’s goals? You don’t even score this many on the playstation, let alone Champions League.” #fcb – @samuelj29060
I can’t even keep track of all the records Messi is breaking. I think he is even setting a record for numbers of records being broken. – @Cnyari
Quick calculation, #Barca have scored 9 goals in 111 mins in this tie, at a goal every 12 mins and 20 secs. #statto – @arlowhite
None! Absolutely none. RT @williamcfoster: @AllenAHopkins Messi is 24 and has no rivals. – @AllenAHopkins
Messi is a joke. For me the best ever. – @WayneRooney
He should be banned from playing football. Unfair for other teams and players. Wonder what CR7 is feeling right now. #Messi – @aziztash
5 goals for some players is a good season. Messi just scored his 5th TODAY in Champions League. Making it look to easy. Wow – @TaylorTwellman
I mean, at some point, it’s just not fair #Messi #Barca – @SteveDavis90