McLeish, Coleman, O’Neill linked with Crystal Palace job

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Ian Holloway hadn’t finished talking about his grandchild before Tony Pulis was linked with the Crystal Palace job, making it a bit surprising the former Stoke City man hasn’t been appointed at Selhurst Park. But as is so often the case, the first hints weren’t the right ones. One week after Holloway’s resignation, “interim” remains attached to the Eagles’ managerial post.

That’s just enough time for a imaginations to start working, which may explain why new candidates for the Palace job are starting to surface. According to the latest reports, those candidates include three well-known coaches looking for Premier League returns.

But have pity for Palace supporters if Alex McLeish gets the job. The 54-year-old Scot is currently out of work after running Birmingham City and Aston Villa into the ground. The Blues remain in the Championship, McLeish having apparently purchased a one-way ticket to the second tier, while Aston Villa’s Premier League lives barely survived the former Rangers boss’s wrath. Since then, McLeish tried his dark arts at Nottingham Forest before leaving the club after 41 days.

It’s a track record of failure that extends back to 2007, when McLeish moved to arrived in the West Midlands after a short stint with the Scottish national team. To his credit, McLeish did lead Birmingham City to a League Cup in 2011 (thanks, Arsenal), but he also orchestrated some of the worst soccer in the Premier League. Pragmatic to the point of being scared, McLeish’s tactics make you hate soccer.

But don’t lose too much sleep yet, Palace fans. According to McLeish, he hasn’t been contacted about the job, even if it sounds like he’s waiting by the phone:

“There hasn’t been any contact yet but I am a free agent,” McLeish said. “Crystal Palace are in a position that’s precarious for them but there’s still a lot of points to play for. I’ve had those kind of challenges before and I’ve had some success and some failures but if you’ve got a fighting spirit and good players playing to their strengths, then why can’t Palace stay up?”

Hiring McLeish would answer that question, though South Norwood should take heart in the fact another man’s name’s being thrown around. Unlike McLeish, Chris Coleman’s Premier League track record’s a mixed one. His first full season in charge of Fulham (2003-04) saw the Cottagers finish ninth, though they were pulled into a relegation battle the following season. After a slow start in 2005-06, Colemen left Craven Cottage.

He went to Real Sociedad and generally succeed but failed with Coventry City on his return to England. In a brief spell in Greece, he also saw success, but financial issues at Larissa led the 43-year-old back home: to coach the Welsh national team. He’s approaching his two-year anniversary on the job.

Unfortunately, Coleman’s tactics aren’t that much more ambitious than McLeish’s. Wondering what he would do in McLeish’s place at Brum or Villa is the type of thought experiment that leads you to wonder why we bother with sports at all. Why, out of all the managers in the world, has Crystal Palace come up with a list of some of the most soul-crushing tacticians in Britain?

Martin O’Neill is also reportedly in the picture, but like McLeish, his last coaching experience was a failed one (not uncommon for managers looking for jobs). Like Pulis’s last years at Stoke, O’Neill’s time at Sunderland featured a lot of spending for few results. And to complete the theme, his Sunderland teams played horrible, horrible football.

Crystal Palace is already in bad enough shape without bringing in a man who will bring their fans to tears. At least find somebody who will try to play good soccer. If that leads them to the Championship, that’s find. The Eagles were always likely to go down. Don’t amplify the agony in the process.

MLS Three Things: RBNY beats Atlanta, is a special club right now

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At this point, Jesse Marsch could take the USMNT job, Tyler Adams could bolt for the Bundesliga, and we’d still have to select the New York Red Bulls to finish with a home playoff game.

[ MORE: Willian’s shot at Conte ]

That’s how well run RBNY is these days, which is to take nothing away from their coach and 19-year-old star, but considering they navigated a solid CONCACAF Champions League run en route to this start… well…. wow.

On a night when Luis Robles’ ironman streak ended, Kaku recorded two assists, and Ezequiel Barco bagged his second goal in three matches, they don’t even meet the requirements of our three things.

Form giants deliver more goals

Marsch’s men have been shutout once this season, and most multiple goals in four-consecutive wins. Three of those four wins have come on the road, at LA, Colorado, and now Atlanta.

RBNY has the best points-per-game in Major League Soccer, has scored the joint-most goals despite playing in the second-fewest games, and is allowing barely more than a goal-a-game.

Bet against ’em. We dare ya.

BWP delivers the goods

RBNY’s 33-year-old English star scored twice and won a penalty that Daniel Royer converted as he continued his assault on all future Red Bulls’ hopes of becoming the club’s leading scorer.

Bradley Wright-Phillips has almost 50 more goals than his nearest competitor, Juan Pablo Angel, and he makes headers look like child’s play.

Victory comes with a price

Kemar Lawrence was lost with a scary-looking face-plant on a clearance, and needed to be stretchered off the pitch. Hopefully it’s not long-term for the Jamaican back.

Willian “edits” Conte out of FA Cup champions photo

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Willian is not a fan of Antonio Conte.

Come to another conclusion if you like, but it’s hard to argue the Brazilian wizard’s feelings following his Instagram post after Chelsea beat Manchester United in the FA Cup Final.

[ MORE: Matic wants squad changes at Man Utd ]

Willian covered his manager in trophies following the win, and it’d be a stretch to call that a tribute to the Italian’s tactical brilliance.

The player recorded seven goals and six assists despite playing less than all but 12 Chelsea players in league play (12th place Alvaro Morata had 11 and 6).

We’re accepting alternative explanations for the since-deleted Instagram photo below:

Elis scores twice as Dynamo beat Fire 3-2

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BRIDGEVIEW, Ill. (AP) Alberth Elis scored two second-half goals to help the Houston Dynamo beat the Chicago Fire 3-2 on Sunday for their first road win of the season.

Elis, on a one-on-one breakaway, cut back to evade defender Johan Kappelhof and ripped a right-footer from the center of the box into the back of the net to give Houston (4-3-3) a 3-2 lead in the 74th minute.

[ MORE: Man Utd youngster gets USMNT call-up ]

The Dynamo’s Romell Quioto opened the scoring in the fourth, running onto a long through ball from Tomas Martinez and rolling the finish past sliding goalkeeper Richard Sanchez. Nemanja Nikolic tied it in the 14th minute and then fed Diego Campos for a goal about two minutes later. Elis converted from the spot to make it 2-2 early in the second half after Mauro Manotas drew a foul in the area conceded by Sanchez.

Chicago (3-6-2) has lost three of its last four games.

 

Inter Milan back in the Champions League after late heroics (video)

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It’s been more than a half-decade since Inter Milan qualified for the UEFA Champions League, an infamous run that ended on Sunday.

Inter scored twice in the final 13 minutes to beat fifth-place Lazio and advance into the Top Four via head-to-head record.

[ MORE: Man Utd youngster gets USMNT call-up ]

Lazio held 1-0 and 2-1 leads, but could not get the job done at home, collecting red cards in the 79th minute and stoppage time.

Uruguayan midfielder Matias Vecino scored his third goal of the season, redirecting a corner kick home in the 81st minute, as Inter clinched fourth place in Serie A.