That invincibility cloak Sepp Blatter seems to think he owns? It’s apparently part of the emperor’s new clothes.
The disgraced FIFA president is serving a 90-day suspension for a payment to UEFA boss Michel Platini, who is suspended for the same period of time.
And while Blatter is also under investigation by the FBI and could face a long time in, well, an American prison, he’s also staring down a long suspension from his beloved football.
Fifa’s ethics investigatory committee is likely to have pushed for a minimum seven-year ban for both Blatter and Platini.
This is based on the similar length of time that Harold Mayne Nicholls – the man who wrote the technical inspection reports for 2018 and 2022 World Cup candidate nations – received for breaching “conflict of interest” rules.
Blatter’s had more serious concerns lately, having suffered through a health scare, one he thought could cost him his life:
“I was between the angels who were singing and the devil who was lighting the fire, but it was the angels who sang,” said Blatter.
“I was close to dying. At some stage the body says ‘no, enough is enough’.”
Right when you were feeling sympathy for the man, he goes and deems himself a John Milton for the soccer set.
Is that cold? Probably, and that’s because at some point covering the Blatter saga starts to feel like scenes with your least favorite character in your favorite TV show. Stay healthy, Mr. Blatter, and stay away.