The game in 100 words (or less): As each week of the 2016 MLS season passes us by, I’m more and more convinced there are one or two good teams — Colorado Rapids and FC Dallas — and they’re going to separate from the pack in the Western Conference and Supporters’ Shield race. (We know this won’t actually happen, because MLS, but sometimes it’s fun to pretend we understand this wacky league.) The Vancouver Whitecaps, who entered the weekend nearest the aforementioned juggernauts in the standings — four and three points back, respectively — just endured the second-most torturous 90 minutes of Rivalry Week, in which they were hammered 4-2 (the score is seriously flattering) by their Cascadia Cup rival and the defending MLS Cup champion Portland Timbers. Diego Valeri, Jack McInerney, Dairon Asprilla and Darlington Nagbe (the pick of the litter – video below) were the goalscorers on the day, as the Timbers (15 poitns) move from eighth to seventh in the West, leapfrogging the Seattle Sounders (13) in the process.
Three moments that mattered
3′ — Kah capitulates and gives away a PK — If only the ground could have opened up a gigantic hole and swallowed Pa Modou Kah in this very moment. Valeri converted the ensuing spot kick.
29′ — McInerney slots past Ousted for 2-0 — Kendall Waston picked the most unfortunate of times to slip and fall flat on his face, and McInerney was quick to capitalize.
77′ — Kah handles in the box, gives away another PK — Kah has (hopefully) had better days than today. Asprilla smashed the ensuing penalty kick for 3-1.
82′ — Nagbe hammers a free kick past Ousted for 4-1 — More of this next month at the 2016 Copa America Centenario … please?
Man of the match: Darlington Nagbe
Goalscorers: Valeri (4′ – PK), McInerney (29′), Manneh (49′), Asprilla (78′), Nagbe (82′) Morales (84′ – PK)