Crystal Palace 3-0 Southampton: Benteke brace backs embattled Pardew

Leave a comment
  • Defensive gaffes cost Saints
  • Palace jumps 13th
  • Benteke nabs two

Christian Benteke and James Tomkins made Southampton’s sleepy defense pay time and again as Crystal Palace spoke up for embattled manager Alan Pardew with a 3-0 win on Saturday at Selhurst Park.

Pardew’s seat was red-hot following six-straight losses, but the Eagles were desperate for the ball in an easy win over sloppy Saints.

Saints are now 11th with 17 points, three points and two places above the hosts.

[ MORE: Watch full PL match replays ]

Saints settled into the match fairly quickly, but had trouble troubling the Palace goal. Sofiane Boufal did some delightful work inside the box to set up a chance that ended with Ryan Bertrand‘s shot deflecting wide of the near post.

Andros Townsend and Wilfried Zaha were lively on the counter, the latter cueing up a header that Christian Benteke dove to head just wide of the goal in the 25th minute.

Benteke got his goal when Fraser Forster had an all-timer of a gaffe, missing his clearance when his plant leg got a piece of it. The Belgian tapped in for an almost literal birthday gift.

[ MORE: Latest Premier League standings ]

[ MORE: Full lineups, stats, box score ]

Oriel Romeu allowed Tomkins his goal by inexplicably stopping his marking on a corner kick, and the defender bundled his effort across the line. 2-0… and stunning.

That wasn’t the end of it, with Benteke and Jason Puncheon shocking the Saints back line by working for a lobbed in prayer off a missed Saints clearance to make it 3-0.

Follow @NicholasMendola

MLS Three Things: RBNY beats Atlanta, is a special club right now

Photo by Refugio Ruiz/Getty Images
Leave a comment

At this point, Jesse Marsch could take the USMNT job, Tyler Adams could bolt for the Bundesliga, and we’d still have to select the New York Red Bulls to finish with a home playoff game.

[ MORE: Willian’s shot at Conte ]

That’s how well run RBNY is these days, which is to take nothing away from their coach and 19-year-old star, but considering they navigated a solid CONCACAF Champions League run en route to this start… well…. wow.

On a night when Luis Robles’ ironman streak ended, Kaku recorded two assists, and Ezequiel Barco bagged his second goal in three matches, they don’t even meet the requirements of our three things.

Form giants deliver more goals

Marsch’s men have been shutout once this season, and most multiple goals in four-consecutive wins. Three of those four wins have come on the road, at LA, Colorado, and now Atlanta.

RBNY has the best points-per-game in Major League Soccer, has scored the joint-most goals despite playing in the second-fewest games, and is allowing barely more than a goal-a-game.

Bet against ’em. We dare ya.

BWP delivers the goods

RBNY’s 33-year-old English star scored twice and won a penalty that Daniel Royer converted as he continued his assault on all future Red Bulls’ hopes of becoming the club’s leading scorer.

Bradley Wright-Phillips has almost 50 more goals than his nearest competitor, Juan Pablo Angel, and he makes headers look like child’s play.

Victory comes with a price

Kemar Lawrence was lost with a scary-looking face-plant on a clearance, and needed to be stretchered off the pitch. Hopefully it’s not long-term for the Jamaican back.

Willian “edits” Conte out of FA Cup champions photo

John Walton/PA via AP
Leave a comment

Willian is not a fan of Antonio Conte.

Come to another conclusion if you like, but it’s hard to argue the Brazilian wizard’s feelings following his Instagram post after Chelsea beat Manchester United in the FA Cup Final.

[ MORE: Matic wants squad changes at Man Utd ]

Willian covered his manager in trophies following the win, and it’d be a stretch to call that a tribute to the Italian’s tactical brilliance.

The player recorded seven goals and six assists despite playing less than all but 12 Chelsea players in league play (12th place Alvaro Morata had 11 and 6).

We’re accepting alternative explanations for the since-deleted Instagram photo below:

Elis scores twice as Dynamo beat Fire 3-2

Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images
Leave a comment

BRIDGEVIEW, Ill. (AP) Alberth Elis scored two second-half goals to help the Houston Dynamo beat the Chicago Fire 3-2 on Sunday for their first road win of the season.

Elis, on a one-on-one breakaway, cut back to evade defender Johan Kappelhof and ripped a right-footer from the center of the box into the back of the net to give Houston (4-3-3) a 3-2 lead in the 74th minute.

[ MORE: Man Utd youngster gets USMNT call-up ]

The Dynamo’s Romell Quioto opened the scoring in the fourth, running onto a long through ball from Tomas Martinez and rolling the finish past sliding goalkeeper Richard Sanchez. Nemanja Nikolic tied it in the 14th minute and then fed Diego Campos for a goal about two minutes later. Elis converted from the spot to make it 2-2 early in the second half after Mauro Manotas drew a foul in the area conceded by Sanchez.

Chicago (3-6-2) has lost three of its last four games.

 

Inter Milan back in the Champions League after late heroics (video)

Giuseppe Lami/ANSA via AP
Leave a comment

It’s been more than a half-decade since Inter Milan qualified for the UEFA Champions League, an infamous run that ended on Sunday.

Inter scored twice in the final 13 minutes to beat fifth-place Lazio and advance into the Top Four via head-to-head record.

[ MORE: Man Utd youngster gets USMNT call-up ]

Lazio held 1-0 and 2-1 leads, but could not get the job done at home, collecting red cards in the 79th minute and stoppage time.

Uruguayan midfielder Matias Vecino scored his third goal of the season, redirecting a corner kick home in the 81st minute, as Inter clinched fourth place in Serie A.