Trialist Freddy Adu called “old vacuum cleaner” by manager

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We checked the toolbar multiple times for The Onion, but this is a real story.

The Daily Mail reports that one-time American whiz kid Freddy Adu is on trial in Poland’s top flight with newly-promoted club Sandecja Nowy Sacz.

What he’s doing there is up for debate, according to his prospective manager.

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Club manager Radoslaw Mrockowski said he has no idea why Adu, 28, is there, and that he’s not the type of player the Polish side needs to succeed.

Mrockowski isn’t some new hat, either, having guided the team to promotion. It’s not pretty for Adu, who is seeking his 14th professional club.

The manager even channels Joe Kinnear by calling Adu by the wrong first name:

“This is not my idea, so let’s face it, the man who wants to have Frank [sic] Adu on the team, I do not accept this, it was not consulted with me. I will not test it, as someone else wants, and they can do it. In my opinion, the club is so ridiculous. Instead of building a team in a sensible way, we are looking for old vacuum cleaners.”

Holy smoke, that’s brutal (and it’s not the first time he’s made the news on account of vacuums). Adu was most recently with Tampa Bay Rowdies for parts of two seasons, playing 13 matches and registering one assist. He hit MLS training camp with the Portland Timbers earlier this year.

This story doesn’t bode well for his next stop, though it seems like Mrockowski might be on the fast track to the unemployment line as well.